However its not a case of me falling out of love with painting and sketching, its more of a matter of forgetting what I am in love with.
My husband always teases me saying "I used to be positive, but now I'm not too sure".
I have always struggled with having faith in my own . Never really seeing myself as an 'artist'.
Even after selling two of my watercolour paintings, I still don't see myself as being called an artist.
I think the problem is that unless I have everyone I know telling me I am this fantastic artist that needs to be selling her work and that they would even buy my work, then I am not an artist.
Just someone who like to draw and paint and isn't that fantastically great.
I was watching re-runs of a TV show the other day, and the girl was telling her male friend that she gave up violin because she wasn't that good at it, and in her family, if you weren't the very best at something then you stop and move on.
The friend then replied, "Haven't you ever done something, just because you love doing it?"
It was this line in the show that struck a chord with me. Why do we as people always strive to be the absolute best there is or quit when we realise maybe we suck.
We are always trying to get approval from everyone else, when all it takes to be happy is to be happy with yourself.
Without getting too emotionally deep, I just want to say that I am happy when I draw and paint. I find it a great escape. No matter what's going on in my life, those few moments I am painting, are calming. Nothing matters in the world accept the colors on the page and I am at peace.
Hugs
Sonya
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